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1  Guests Area / Jokes, funny pictures! / Re: Jokes, funny pictures, put all this stuff here! on: Tue 28.06.2011 15:30:18
2  Guests Area / Jokes, funny pictures! / Re: Jokes, funny pictures, put all this stuff here! on: Sun 12.06.2011 13:07:20
3  Guests Area / Music / Re: The music thread on: Mon 21.02.2011 21:09:23
4  Guests Area / Jokes, funny pictures! / Re: Jokes, funny pictures, put all this stuff here! on: Thu 03.02.2011 14:22:15
5  Guests Area / Jokes, funny pictures! / Re: Jokes, funny pictures, put all this stuff here! on: Mon 10.01.2011 23:36:08
Sorry for posting in german but I dunno if there's an english version:
Der perfekte Tag für eine Frau -
08.15 Mit Schmusen und Küssen geweckt werden. 08.30 2 Kilogramm weniger als am Vortag wiegen 08.45 Frühstück im Bett mit frisch gepresstem Orangensaft und Croissants, Geschenke öffnen, z.B. teuren Schmuck vom aufmerksamen Partner ausgewählt. 09.15 Heisses Bad mit Duftöl nehmen 10.00 Leichtes Workout im Fitnessclub mit hübschem, humorvollem persönlichem Trainer 10.30 Gesichtspflege, Maniküre, Haare waschen, Kurpackung in den Haaren einwirken lassen, fönen. 12.00 Mittagessen mit der besten Freundin im In-Lokal 12.45 Die Exfrau oder Exfreundin des Partners begaffen und feststellen, dass sie 7 kg zugenommen hat. 13.00 Einkaufen mit Freunden, unbegrenzter Kreditrahmen. 15.00 Mittagsschlaf 16.00 Drei Dutzend Rosen, werden angeliefert mit einer Karte von einem geheimen Bewunderer 16.15 Leichtes Workout im Fitnessclub, gefolgt von einer Massage durch einen starken aber freundlichen Typen, der sagt, dass er selten einen solchen perfekten Körper massiert hat. 17.30 Outfit aus der Auswahl teurer Designer-Klamotten anprobieren und vor dem Vollkörperspiegel eine Modeschau veranstalten. 19.30 Candle Light Dinner für zwei Personen, gefolgt von Tanzen, verbunden mit Komplimenten. 22.00 Heisse Dusche (alleine) 22:50 Ins Bett getragen werden, das frisch gewaschen und gebügelt ist 23.00 Schmusen 23.15 In seinen starken Armen einschlafen. -

Der perfekte Tag für den Mann -
06.00 Wecker klingelt 06.15 Blow Job 06.30 Großer befriedigender Morgenschiß, dabei den Sportteil der Zeitung lesen! 07.00 Frühstück: Rump Steak und Eier, Kaffee und Toast, zubereitet von einer nackten Hausangestellten. 07.30 Limousine kommt an 07.45 Einige Gläser Whiskey auf dem Weg zum Flughafen. 09.15 Flug in Privatjet 09.30 Limousine mit Chauffeur zum Golf Club (Blow Job unterwegs) 09.45 Golf spielen 11.45 Mittagessen: Fast Food, 3 Bier, eine Flasche Dom Perignon 12.15 Blow Job 12.30 Golf spielen 14.15 Limousine zurück zum Flughafen (einige Gläser Whiskey) 14.30 Flug nach Monte Carlo 15.30 Nachmittagsausflug zum Fischen, Begleiterinnen sind alle nackt 17.00 Flug nachhause, Ganzkörpermassage durch Verona Feldbusch 18.45 Scheissen, Duschen, Rasieren 19.00 Nachrichten anschauen: Michael Jackson umgebracht, Marihuana und Hardcore-Pornos legalisiert. 19.30 Abendessen: Hummer als Vorspeise, Dom Perignon (1953), großes saftiges Filetsteak, gefolgt von Eiscreme serviert auf bloßen Brüsten 21.00 Napoleon Cognac und eine Cohiba Zigarre vor einem Großbildschirm-Fernseher, Sportschau anschauen. Deutschland schlägt England 11:0 21.30 Sex mit drei Frauen (alle drei mit lesbischen Neigungen) 23.00 Massage und Bad im Whirlpool, dazu eine leckere Pizza und ein reinigendes Helles 23.30 Gute-Nacht-Blow-Job 23.45 Alleine im Bett liegen 23.50 Ein 12-sekündiger Furz, der die Tonart 4mal wechselt und den Hund nötigt, den Raum zu verlassen...

 rofl
6  Guests Area / Jokes, funny pictures! / Re: Jokes, funny pictures, put all this stuff here! on: Wed 05.01.2011 15:18:12
7  Guests Area / Hardware / Re: Headset advices on: Thu 30.12.2010 20:25:03
Geart topic Vegas!!  Smiley - I would've started the same some days later cause my hs is at one's deathbed so I need a new 1 2   Cool
Guess the Siberia is a nice choice but a would rather prefer sennheiser as I made positive experiences with the marke. It's just the high price...(and for u no inbuilt mic)
Otherwise the smaller Version PC 161 might be a good choice too
8  Unreal Tournament 3 / Joining _Dark_ Clan / Re: Myrb on: Wed 15.12.2010 23:42:31
I love u all...



...welcome myrb  msn012.gif
9  Guests Area / Jokes, funny pictures! / Re: Jokes, funny pictures, put all this stuff here! on: Wed 02.06.2010 18:10:28
The best passport application rejection  Grin

10  Guests Area / Jokes, funny pictures! / Re: Jokes, funny pictures, put all this stuff here! on: Wed 26.05.2010 14:03:27

11  Unreal Tournament 3 / Dark Clan & Unreal Tournament 3 / Re: I leave the _Dark_ clan to create a new one. on: Thu 01.04.2010 10:55:38
Atomtrooper...Stormrolf is ready to take off !! 

12  Guests Area / Jokes, funny pictures! / Re: Jokes, funny pictures, put all this stuff here! on: Thu 21.01.2010 17:45:34
no i dont!!!
i just see a stupid show!!!

a tip:
  wasted
13  Guests Area / Off Topic / Re: They made it! Hedsteem came to europe for a try! on: Tue 12.01.2010 22:52:41
HAHAH You Euros are such fucking losers.....Hitler should have killed all your parents long ago and took over...


lol @ u --> who is as daft as a b(r)ush?  smile_rofl.gif




14  Guests Area / Jokes, funny pictures! / Re: Jokes, funny pictures, put all this stuff here! on: Thu 31.12.2009 16:16:01
15  Unreal Tournament 3 / Clan Matches - unofficial / Re: PrototypE [4] vs Dark [3], 22th November 2009 on: Thu 03.12.2009 20:57:18
for movies maybe, but apparantly not for players  blablabla.gif
anyway you all have the right to your own opinions  tongue
vegas your replies are too angry, no need for such harsh words over a video

I dont recruit people, I have no authority in the clan - I just play
but we never recruited 3 guys in one day or so, always petty arguements here between us, I bet this wouldnt happen if I didnt have PTE tag, I never had problem with you guys  Cool

yes yes, all dark players are gods silly me for questioning them, its not the skill of the recruitments but the quantity and the frame of time
I dont care, I just thought I'd point it out after you are talking about "dark is quality not quantity" etc
and I saw mord playing the other day

thats predominantly waste

I don't wanna explain u in detail what "quality" means from _darks_ point of view, but since ur words are simply not true there's the need for adjust this:

We never choose our members only by skill, but also by their behaviour and character. Since some of us already met in real life, we know each other pretty good and aren't focused that much on ut3 as some of u all may think. People like Basher eg., who often asked to join, might be skilled enough but thier character simply doesn't meet our expectations. What we do is: we always look for good and gentle people, independent from our actual number of active players and discuss them in our forum. We've asked lightmyfire long time before he joined wether he would like to. With the retirement of Splitter and Martini, our passive scan became more active and we increased the effort to get some of them. Anyways the discussion about them began long time before in our closed section, so that wasn't a kind of hectic actionism but the result of our retrieval. The point that they all joined on the same day is nothing but fluke. So, does it begins to dawn on u what quality of players means by our outlook??
Honestly thats why _dark_ became one of the best ut3 "brands" whereas other clans like
u know what to put in here
are more or less little volcanos that sooner or later break off and quit the game or stir their members. _Dark_ runs since a long time and in the long run we provide more substance than most of the other (vctf)-clans (btw: our alive page is the best exaple for the significance in the ut3-community)
See u online!
16  Guests Area / Other Games / Re: Warcraft 3 TFT - Tower Defence on: Fri 27.11.2009 15:27:55
what u mean sova!!!
no wonder we u steal every crepe to get more money a build more towers no wonder!!! but on this map u have to balance the money that no crepe comes to the middle!!! just think about it

Mmmhhhhh, tasty crepes.
Awesome with hazelnut cream or just sugar. Didn't know that u get money when u steal them.  xxxshifty.gif
Vive la France!!
17  Unreal Tournament 3 / Clan Matches - unofficial / Re: Want a Friendly / Training War? on: Mon 23.11.2009 10:51:13
I can tell you we ain't changing anymore. And btw, I know for certain that dark members have changed name as well...

 blahblah.gif

If I'm willing to respect one's privacy and wishes, then that is my concern... Not yours.

That has nothing to do with privacy dude... It's just the attempt to flood the interior ut3-scene with mystic light by a cloak-and-dagger operation  sarcastic  awesome!   smiley_clap.gif

---

anyways, I don't wanna say gg since I wasn't part of it but congrats.
18  Unreal Tournament 3 / Dark Clan & Unreal Tournament 3 / No teamplay on public servers on: Tue 10.11.2009 10:54:29
19  Unreal Tournament 3 / Say hi here! / Re: Say 'hi' here! on: Mon 09.11.2009 14:13:59
Salut!  Smiley  (other words i didn't understand)


Nah Sova, French is less complicated than u might think:

first u should watch out for key-words that everyone uses and have at least 1000 different meanings - depending on the articulation and situation in that they were used. The three most inalienable words are:

Bon, Boff and Baguette.


Bon - answering in monosyllables sometimes is worth a thousand words. "Bon" not just embody the simple verbalism "good" but encloses the whole french attitude to life what they might call there the "joie de vivre". U had a good meal, well - it was "bon". U got low cost clothes - that's "bon marché". U're strong and healthy - u've a "bon dos". U see sova a simple "bon" might be enough to do "bon ménage" with ur french friends. But now pay attention! Like well-known from the asian languages the right intonation can enhance goodwill as well as raising hackles: a short squeezed "bon", bred unimposing and sharp-tongued, phrases rejection and subservience whereas the melodic version with the loooong "ooo" and even longer "nnnnnn" [speak: ngngngng] shows gushy euphoria and love. Last-mentioned can be often observed while eating baguettes or cater wine by talking about the "bon vieux temps".


Boff - a monosyllable as well, the little "boff" has to be understood in a metaphorical way: not just "boff" but "boff" [bofffffffffpfffpffff] or "boff" [buff; speak as high as u can]. Didn't get the difference? Watch this: u're sitting on the Seine's banks, eating a big baguette. Since one an a half meter (what's medium size) are to big for ur untrained mouth (real French actually put them diagonally in their mouth) u break it in half. Since u live in Israel u should know that breaking bread contains somehow something spiritual, but that has nothing on the meaning there: what u did is u made one baguette two and thats really worth a surprised "boff" [-pfpfpfpffffff] which take their hats off to u - for 30 secs...then us did what u never should do: u cut the holy bread in two halves and put chester, sausages and black pudding on it - treachery! A hushed but intensive "boff" [buff, sounds as it looks like] shows that u're no more welcome in this country. Last but not least they combinate the "bon" with the "boff" and wish u bb.


Baguette - christs have the bible, jews the tora, muslims the quran, French the baguette. The baguette is not only a long bap, but symbolizes the values the French fight for in 1789: liberté, égalité, fraternité. Standing in front of the kings troops in Versailles, knowing that time is ripe for Revolution, they noticed suddenly that they, disadvantagly, had no weapons and puzzeled in the mizzle. Since they had absolutely nothing but baguettes, they produced over a million in just one night, put them outside overnight and had adamant weapons to fight Louis who finally lost his head by a bread. So the baguette became the most important status symbol in France: "Yours is only 2 metres - hah mine is 5." Street-competitions like those often end in "baguette-comparisons". On July 14th, the national holiday in France, the whole nation gathers in front of their tv's to watch the annual "baguette-day", what the Dutch later copied with dominos. The original recipe is top-secret and bequeathed from generation to generation. It's just made by string together baps like people are rumouring or filling the dough into long socks that get cooked - a riddle wrapped up in an enigma.


From bon to boff to baguette - u see Sova, French is much more than learning vocabularies but also knowing how to use it. However u don't need much words to get an access to the language - just use those three words, mix it, watch for intonation and people won't catch u as non-French.


Bon courage!  Smiley
20  Guests Area / Jokes, funny pictures! / Re: Jokes, funny pictures, put all this stuff here! on: Sun 13.09.2009 12:08:11
funny commercial  xxxlaugh.gif
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